Connection To Destruction

I love the chaos.

I have a connection to the destruction.

When I hear about "natural" disasters I get excited.

Yes I have darkness.

It is part of me.

It's getting clearer as I get older that I am from another realm.

I am here and now for many reasons and not all of them are for me but for you.

I do dirty work.

I am a sin eater.

I go places that you will not allow yourself to believe in.

I do things that you have forbidden yourself to do.

I bring you gifts that you're not grateful for.

I am not the only one, but I am alone.

You do not understand me.

And tho there's really no reason for it, you just can't accept me.

I have memories of wars, and pains, and events that no one has ever heard of. 

I am a shadow warrior.

I fight battles that most don't know exist.

I serve my purpose.

I am one of the endless number of facets of love, whether you like it or not!

I just may laugh at your demise...

That's ok, because I understand it.

And you don't...... 

LMFAO!!!

#Strawberry Salad

And inspired recipe....

Fresh Strawberries, about a pint, stemmed and sliced
Fresh Kale, about 4 or 5 nice sized leaves, stemmed and chopped bite size
Fresh Lime Juice, about half a lime
1 Fresh Avocado, cut into bite size slices
2 or 3 nice sprigs of fresh Basil, chopped

I chopped the Kale and squeezed the limes over it and let it set to break down and tenderize the leaves. I also put the cut up avocado in with this mixture because I happen to have a very firm one.
While this sets, I made the dressing as follows...

Dressing:
1 cup of Pure Cranberry Juice
1/4 cup of raw sugar - I use Turbinado
1 half cup finely chopped Strawberries

Put it all in a small sauce pan and heat it up so that the sugar melts. Then turn it down low to warm just so the Strawberries can break down well and flavor the syrup. Keep on heat about half hour then remove to cool. I put mine in the freezer while I made bizkits ;) About a half hour. It was just about to get slushy when I took it out. Perfect!
Add Poppy Seeds. As many as you like! Then add about a quarter cup of oil. I used Olive. Mix it all up well.

Back to the tenderizing salad. Add the Strawberries and Basil. Pour the dressing over and mix it all up well.

Yumma mificent!!!!!

#CHAOS #Donald #Trump is NOT Your Problem!

And the CHAOS!!!!
Do you feel it???

NOTHING makes sense. From the smallest thing to the grandest.

Two car crashes right in front of my apartment since last night! WHY!? It's just Drew Street!
Sirens all day long . . . . . Every day! (Wednesday 3 16 16 was slow - only heard one!)
Sirens from ambos, EMTs, firetrucks, cops... day and night! You'd think we lived in Chicago! But no, it's just lowly little Clearwater Florida. It's never been like this since we lived here.

Chaos.

Along with the joint pains I forget to mention acid!
Heartburn.
Acid reflux.
Whatever you wanna call it. No matter what I eat. I eat well. I indulge. But I eat better than most.
Occasionally money gets in the way, but unless it does, I and my girls eat organic stuff. Seafood, no meat. No farm-raised shit. No GMOs.
Unless we "indulge" in some corporate crap food. Which we do every now and then!

Chaos.

Everything feels like chaos. There is no rhyme. There is no reasoning. Craziness. Chaos.
If I had not done so much work I would be terrified!!!
But I just shake my head and laugh....

I'm telling everyone, as I have from week one - Donald Trump is NOT your problem!!!!!
He is the medicine!

There are much worse things to be concerned about right now.... Like, CHAOS. And whether or not you feel it.... whether or not you have any freaking clue what I'm talking about right now! If you don't, I'm concerned for you!
Yes YOU!!!
The ones I love.
The ones who don't read my messages.

Whatevs man.......
The babysitter left the building a few months back. Yall on yall own. I'm here. But I no longer beg your attention. It's your journey. It's your choice.
But I hear a different hum.... I feel a different rattle.....
And if that means I leave you behind.....

Well.............

Fear-in-a-Grave-White-T-shirt

#Energy Report: March 17 #2016

3 o'cock........
4 o'clock.......
4:19 am........
Woke up with the head/neck ache.
Medicine - Coffee.
No worries. It'll put me right back to sleep.

Leaks.
Tub. Kitchen sink. Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip........
Can't turn them off.
Bathroom door - off the hinges. Screws came out. LOL

It's all falling apart. Literally! LMAO!

I'm so far out of the loop of normal everyday humanity.... Even those that would call me "friend" just don't understand me.
The weird lung feeling.... The joint pains.... I'm crazy for not going to a doctor. LMAO
And I think you're crazy for taking all those pills and being no better off than me....
Ya see, what I realize about my "ills" is that they are messages.
These are manifestations of the energy that is swarming into our planet lately.
You think you are "sick".
I think I'm receiving a message.
You live in fear of being able to maintain medical insurance and having enough money to buy your meds....
I Know I'm not sick and have no such worries. My aches and pains and weird sensations always serve their purpose, and then move on. Always.

People say they believe in GOD.
In what way???

Of course I have weaknesses. Two of them. And I feel quite helpless in regards to their needs.
The "normal" world mocks and shouts obscenities at me, even if only in my own mind...
This is not the truth.
I will not walk in it.
I will not bow to it.
I will be ridiculed and misunderstood.
I will eagerly seek out open doors and opportunities.
But I will not compromise the truth that I've fought so hard to find.
I will not live my life by fear and human clichés.

Where is the purpose and point of this "new" energy ourpouring they speak of??? Is it not to bring resolution and remedy to the broken.... Of mind, spirit, AND body? To build a whole new level of evolution where pain and decay are no longer necessary?
I don't simply sit here and wait..... I sit here and anticipate. I watch. I pay attention. I ask.... How the hell can we fix this?

#Twitter Will Not Allow This Link to My #T-shirt Store So....

Bobamathingy Tee Shirts

This is just one of almost 100 designs. More added weekly.                                    Check out some 

totally cool T-shirts right here!

I don't care! This is a funny shirt!

#Energy Report: March 15 2016

Messages come thru intermittently and if I don't write them out quickly I lose them.

Blank.
Such a blank.
I mean its getting really empty in here now!
Not a spark..... No creative gift even tho I've been giftedly creative all my life. I can't draw, I can't cook.... I can't sew, I can't make a video to save my life. It's like "I" am gone.... but I'm still here and obviously alive.

Restless!!!
Urgent!
No where to go with it.
Nothing will work. So I do not engage. Not because I've "given up" but because I know, I can tell, I feel it! I've had enough experience with "work" and "won't work" to know the difference! Yes experience!!! Not books or videos!
The only physical outlet for the past couple of days has been coloring in some scribbles I... well, scribbled.
I used to make beautiful pieces! This.... not so much. Busy work.

Sleep.
Take off.
Meditate into the lucid state.
Sandra Walter's Ascension Path Guided Activation is POWERFUL! (Guided Activation)
But even without it, sleeping will allow me into the spirit state, and that is the safest, most productive place to be for me right now.
This is the work.
That works.

Five major joint structures are painful - hips, shoulders, knees. Mostly left knee, right shoulder.
Have random very strange sensations in my lungs. This one is new.
During my last "activation" listening to Sandra's guided meditation I stopped breathing toward the end and really startled myself!  LMAO
I can't feel food very often lately. Fruit yesterday was like Manna!!! Coffee. Water. Everything else..... bleh.

My dog is having similar symptoms.... Well, weak hips and legs. We share a very strange linkage he and I! I learn much from him.

I am fading away. And I'm really beginning to be ok with that.
Nothing matters. Love matters.
My ego/mind doesn't have near the power of control it did even a year ago.

I've worked my ass off to get here.
It's a strange place, that most really think they want but don't even have the balls to do what it takes to get here, much less do they understand what this place really is!
It's Bizzarro Land!!!

Do not judge another's path.
Comment on it, observe it, critique it! But don't pass judgement... Because you really really really don't know what the fuck you're talking about if you do!!! REALLY! I don't fit in ANYWHERE! And I've had to learn to embrace that. Find the treasures, the wisdom, the purpose, the freedom, and the power in that. Lose the pain, the attitudes, the disappointments, and discouragements.
I've had to learn "to be" . . . nothing. And be not only OK with that, but be in love with that!
That.... is godhood.

Giving up the millenia of ego encoding that insists on what it means to be alive and human and successful..... In exchange for the truth. For god.
There is no "path" to god.
There is only becoming god.
God becoming you.... Integration. Unity. Singularity. One.
It's not what you think. It's not even what you think it is when you KNOW it's not what you think...!

Nothing matters anymore!!!
Love matters.

Here's the deal, here's what you're all "fighting" over...

The Obvious.
You're all whining and screaming like a bunch of toddlers who need naps.
The basic issues are simple....

First off, you're trying to fix the car without ever lifting the hood. You've even resorted to beating the shit out of the car for being broken! But you just won't use common sense and accept the fact that you can't fix the car without fixing the individual parts.
It's too big!
Start small and local and in your own community.
"Mass" production has become obsolete. It is destroying everything from the environment, to the economy, to the family. Yet that's the only choice most people are given. Why??? Corporate slave owners. They wouldn't be caught dead working manual labor, and they wouldn't be caught dead letting you be free and independent. Their empire would crash without you. So they give you the illusion of freedom so that you never wake up and remember who you are, figure it all out, and fight back.

It starts in school.
School is wrong.
Children are not taught what they need to learn in the "school system". It's so painfully obvious yet no one no one no one will change it!!! Look at what the school system produces... Look at what it turns out.... You bitch about how your tax dollars are spent (not about politicians salaries, but about the poor!!!) and yet you allow this to continue!
You honestly believe that you've elected some person - who gets paid enormous amounts of your tax dollars in salary!!! - that is supposed to make everything the way its supposed to be. Yet you don't even know this "person".
How is this ok???
Would you recommend handling the situation this way to your child? Is this the way you would teach them to be a good and responsible American?
The world has changed UNIMAGINABLY in the past ten years!!!!!
The world that existed FIFTY years ago...... GONE!!! And I was alive back then!
So how is it, with all our advances in technology and science and awareness and .... everything! that we have not updated the "school system" accordingly???? This is criminal!!!
We all talk about it in the streets and in our homes..... But politicians NEVER talk about it. No one actually LEADS a community and fights to better it. No one will step up and bring in the changes that are necessary, that are OBVIOUS, that are ridiculously overdue. All the while.... tax dollars are bleeding and bleeding and bleeding all over the streets with no purpose or effect.

You don't see it,
You don't try to understand it,
You just jump on one of the two band-wagons presented to you by the mainstream media.
And if they don't offer you anything, you are completely oblivious.
You simply continue to bitch randomly and blame the poor.


Prescription drugs and Medicine
There are more commercials on prescription drugs than there are about fast food these days!!!
COMMERCIALS ABOUT DRUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It is now.... a choice?? ... for you to pick the drugs you want from a TV commercial?????
"Ask your doctor about ________" ??????
What the hell ever happened to your doctor knowing what the fuck they were doing!?
You bitch about prices and INSURANCE!
But you know absolutely nothing about anything so everything they tell you is gospel. You have no idea what any of them are talking about, you get more information from the damn TV ads, like they were a new flavor of Pringles.... And that's how you deal with your HEALTH!!!!!! Like Pringles!!!!
You don't even know what the word "HEALTH" means!

Vaccinations
This subject is just a loaded gun... The crazy cousin of the above "prescription drug" issue. There's really just no talking about it! No one no one no one has any god-given sense anymore, no one knows a goddamn thing about biology anymore, no one knows how to "know" anymore!!! You make all your choices based on what somebody else says, and fear of being accused of being irresponsible and a crazy wack job for thinking you can take care of your own health.

BRAINWASHED!!! You are all psychopaths! You are all incapable of feeling and of independent thought!

Elected officials
Campaigns
The voting system
Most elected officials make a huge salary!
And most elected officials don't do a damn thing to earn it. This is fact, not bitchery. Who checks in on elected officials to see what they're doing all day every day? No one.
No one even notices them until they "get caught" doing something that they can be shamed or convicted for.
Is this right? Is this democracy? Is this what you want your children to learn in school? Is this the "history" your children are learning about in school? Why not?!?!? It's the truth! NO ONE monitors elected officials. You don't even know who the elected officials in your community are.
NAME ONE...!
But kids aren't really supposed to learn the truth in school now are they?  Did you?

Elected officials earn way too much money! They get paid with tax dollars. Meaning voters should be able to remedy this atrocity... but they don't.
Campaigns for candidates running for an elected office cost millions and millions of dollars. This is insane. This is just wrong to spend this money to fight for a job of SERVICE to one's own community.  Money spent to prove who's the most honest and trustworthy... To prove that the other candidates are LIARS... This is a joke. And you know it is. But you do nothing about it. You keep playing the game of "voting" for the least of the evils as if that's the only way possible to do things.
You are lazy lazy lazy. You do not cherish your freedom. You cherish that you're allowed to avoid responsibility - and you CALL this freedom. The money spent on campaigning could be used in such better ways. But you choose to allow the absurdity.....
The voting system is not accurate. It is HUGE, how could it be fair, honest, accurate and truly representative of the will of the people? The American Idol voting system is probably the best, most secure, and most accurate in existence today. "But it can be manipulated in ways we can't see or know about!!!"  And the system you use now - electronic voting machines - cannot?????? Not only CAN they be manipulated, they ARE manipulated on a regular basis. There is nothing fair about this process. The people in charge are not honest. Money buys everybody. EVERYBODY! And what money cannot buy, fear can destroy.

Guns
War is not the answer. Make love, not war. Peace. Guns don't kill people, people kill people. The Second Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America ensures that the right of the people to keep and bare arms shall not be infringed upon...
Why would they write this into the Constitution!?
Because they were not so brainwashed back then....
Things were simpler.... There was no mass media streaming 24 hours a day telling people what to think and believe.... And therefore more people were allowed to EXPERIENCE reality! And reality said that people were so so so very tired of CENTURIES of oppression and control and slavery!!!!! And they KNEW that men were evil and greedy and unscrupulous and that power corrupts and the only protection was a written constitution and the power to ensure every person's right to fight back when they saw things getting shady. They KNEW things would eventually get shady! And they were right!!! But the people today are so brainwashed and divided that they can't tell they're ALL being boiled alive...
It's true - laws do not stop criminals.
The Constitution does not make government honest.
And a gun does not make you a killer.
What amazes me is that everybody is  SO FOCUSED ON THE GUNS that NOBODY is asking why guns are such a problem in our era!!! 
There have been guns for centuries but never the problems America faces today about "gun violence".  And here's a recently discovered historical fact - people have ALWAYS been violent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Even before guns.
Why is nobody asking what is causing the rage and insanity and trying to address that issue??? Removing guns will not fix anything. Killing OBL did NOT stop terrorism! There are more atrocities in Africa than there ever have been in the Middle East yet there are no UN armies fighting for the people there.... Ever wonder about that?? If you take away the guns, the people using them will only find another tool of destruction because they are still the same people with the same problems and pains and dissatisfactions as they were before.
Guns are not the problem but the majority of you just cannot see that!

Wake up! Human beings were never meant to be controlled!! So so so many god-fearing religious people in the world, who believe that their god is THE god, and that their god is all powerful, omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent and eternal.
These same people believe that this same god IS LOVE. And yet they live in absolute fear!!!
They DON'T believe in their god,
they DON'T trust their god,
they DON'T believe their god is the god of love and they
CERTAINLY DON'T believe that their god is all powerful!!!
These people believe in laws and punishment, not the transformative power of god. They think the "transformative power of god" is obeying a set of rules to prove your loyalty to god... which is actually just an idea! And idea of what a particular group of people interpret as "god". There's no power in that!!! That's not real transformation!!!
The power of religion is GUILT, FEAR, SHAME...!
Nothing screams the LOVE OF GOD like those things!
This is called "behavior modification" not the transformative power of GOD!

Real power would not fear guns or the goons that carry them. A real god of love would not care about guns.... only about a person's troubled heart and how they might be healed and not need to misuse a gun.... or drugs... or children... or ANYTHING.
Church and religious people are BULLSHIT!!! And I cannot emphasize that enough!!!
Bullshit!

If this were truly a democracy this shit would change!
But this is not a democracy.
No one knows shit in this country!!! You don't know your history. You don't know the truth. And you don't know how to find it!
You don't know how to think for yourself.

I find it so difficult not to hate you because you do not cease to run your opinionated mouth, judging and criticizing everybody for everything and you don't even know the real truth, nor do you care to. How do I not hate you for causing so much pain, while prancing so high and mighty? How do I keep myself from desiring your destruction? How do I help you? How do I allow you to help me? How do I connect to you at all?
How do we form a productive, satisfying, functional community?
How...?

How do we live in peace and love each other like all gods teach us to???
These are the things that concern me night and day. These are the things I want to have conversations - not debates or arguments - about. Things that matter. But no one will enter the conversation.

Your solution - Fall in line slave. Do not be different, it only causes trouble. Allow the system to work. If you want things to change VOTE.

These remedies keep getting you further and further into a grave...
Why can't you see it's not working. And doing the same things over and over again cannot and will not EVER fix it.... And why can't you see that IT CAN BE FIXED!? 
PEOPLE can be fixed.  But not the way its been done before.
We're the best there is. The most evolved of our era. Look around. We have outgrown EVERYTHING!!!!!!!
Allow it to get better.

It's easier for you to believe in a magical genie in the sky than it is for you to believe in yourself...

So fuck off.
Until the real you can look me in the eye....